Come sit awhile....

I was going through some old blog posts and "found" this. I say found, like it was an accident, but it wasn't.....God knew I needed to be encouraged by this post again and led me to it. My prayer is that it encourages you as well:

I was reading an old journal this morning during my very SHORT prayer time (got up late!) and Lord, as I read it, my heart cried out for You! Where is this girl who poured out her heart to You, who dove into the Word, hungry for more and more and more? Reading my commentary of several Old Testament passages, I was a little surprised by my wisdom and understanding of the scriptures which ONLY comes from the Holy Spirit. None of me- all of You, Lord. I do not want this to sound prideful at all because it is not TRACY, but You, God!

You had given me such depth of knowledge of what I was studying that it surprised me this morning. But, hasn't that been my prayer from the start? That You Lord would "give me a spirit of wisdom and understanding so that I may know You better?" And, when "you draw near to God, He will draw near to you." And, "Seek the Lord with all your heart and He will be found by you." Those have always been my prayers.....what I have been crying out for from the beginning. You answer prayer! I had forgotten the things I had written. That makes me sad.

I want to continue to grow in You, Lord. I want to continue to go deeper. I want to experience You more and more. I want Your Word to continue to open up to me and "blow me away."

Last week I was listening to Revelation (Audio Bible) and again, Revelation 2:2-5 hit me.

"I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance....Yet
I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the
height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at
first."

Oh, Lord, I repent! I do not want to forsake You! I want to draw nearer to You, not become distant! O, Lord, forgive me!

What is going on?

One thing that comes to mind is busyness. Oh, how the enemy loves to use this against me! And, it is not a new trick, but one that is "tried and true" that he brings back again and again to trip me.

Lord, I know I need to come and rest in You....to come and sit with You awhile. I love You so much, Lord. I want to grow in my relationship with You! I don't want to backslide! I don't want to forget my first love! I love You so much, Jesus!

Thank You for reminding me about these journals. Thank You for reminding me that "You pour out Your wisdom GENEROUSLY to anyone who asks." Thank You for slowing me down to rest in You. I know You are the most important thing in life. I know You are my first love. I rededicate myself to You. I ask You, Lord, to fill my cup to overflowing again. My heart and flesh cry out, for You the living God. You are life. You are life. I love You.

I can do all things through Christ!

AAAAHHHH!!!!!!!! Why did I schedule a Party Lite party AND a garage sale both during the LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL??????? Looking at the calendar, it didn't seem so bad.......

But, silly me....don't I know that in ALL things God works for my good? He teaches me so many lessons when I meet quietly with Him. And, WOW! How His Holy Spirit works when I allow Him....when I stay close to Him.....walking with Him.....leaning on Him.....clinging to Him.

Let me give you an example. Being a "good girl", I was making reminder calls to some of the ladies I had invited to my party. During that time, TWO of my friends that I hadn't talked to for a while shared tremendous trials and difficulty with me and we had the opportunity to pray together. I also am continuing to lift them up on my own. I will also continue to encourage them now that I know about their struggles. IF I hadn't been having a party, I wouldn't have known. IF I hadn't obeyed the Spirit's prompting and begun making calls, I wouldn't have known. Oh, my sweet sisters and brothers in Christ, "God works ALL things (even Party Lite parties) together for the good of those who love Him and all called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)

As I have been pondering this, and as I have been encouraging myself NOT to be stressed, but reminding myself that He will equip me and help me IF I lean on upon Him, trusting Him.....and clinging to Him, I read this in my daily reading:

"When you turn from your problems to My Presence (Jesus "speaking" to us), your load is immediately lighter. Circumstances may not have changed, but we carry your burdens together. Your compulsion to "fix" everything gives way to deep, satisfying connection with Me. Together we can handle whatever this day brings." from Jesus Calling.

Lord God, I thank You that You care for all of the silly, little things in my life. I am tempted to NOT pray about things like garage sales and parties and kids' activities because I think YOU may think it silly.....YOU have more important things to listen about.....like cancer and oil spills and lost jobs. I can feel "guilty" about "bothering" You with my petty things when there are so many other "more important" things to be praying about..... But, are You not God?? Are You not big enough for ALL of these things???? From garage sales to oil spills, YOU ARE BIG ENOUGH! And, You care about it all! If it is important to me, then it is important to YOU! If it is a concern to me, then You want me to bring it to YOU! You can "handle" all of our problems.....we don't "use up" Your power.....it is endless........You are enough! Lord, I pray Your Word over my circumstances today- I trust in You with all of my heart, leaning NOT upon my own understanding, but in all of my ways, I acknowledge You and You will direct my steps, You will straighten my path. I choose NOT to worry about anything (not any of my trials, problems, or circumstances), but instead, in prayer and petition, WITH THANKSGIVING, I present my requests to You and then the peace that passes all understanding will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Jesus, You tell me to come to You.....to give You my burden and take Your Yoke upon me because YOUR yoke is easy and You will give me rest. And, You promise that in ALL things You are working for my good because I love You. Thank You, God for Your love......for Your mercy....and Your grace. You are GOOD. In Jesus' Name. AMEN!

Going Deep

Greetings, dear Reader! Thank you for your patience as I have taken some time away from blogging..... Gosh, it's been 23 days since I have posted! I have been "going deep" with God and needed TIME to dig into what He has been showing me.

Here is an excerpt I emailed to a friend explaining my absence. Please consider it written to you as well! I have been praying daily for you, and even though I have been replying minimally to comments, I have been reading each one. Thank you for your kind encouragement! Here is the email:

Girl, I know I have been silent lately....you are constantly on my mind AND always in my prayers. I continue to pray for you....yes.....blanketing, bathing, enveloping you in prayer, dear one!

I just have 2 words:

BELIEVING GOD

It is Beth Moore's bible study that I am redoing (did it 5 yrs. ago). Wow. It has been awesome, but very time consuming (IN A GREAT WAY!)- I have to think of a different word than "consuming"- that sounds negative.......

Girl, FAITH.....even when we think we are "full" of faith, God encourages us to go even deeper....believe Him even more....."push the envelope".....I am not sticking my big toe in, testing the "faith waters", but am doing a HUGE cannonball in an OCEAN of believing.....but, it has taken ALL of me....

And, it has taken ALL of me.....but, BOY, how I have seen God work these weeks since Easter! I have missed you and missed blogging and have so much to share with you!

I cant wait.......

Until then,
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Blessings!

How do I slow down?!.....Word Filled Wednesday

"He will quiet you with His love." Zephaniah 3:17

Well, how do we slow down?!

I was once preparing for a talk called "Don't Waste Your Life!" when a dear friend asked what the topic was about. I told her it that it is about God's plans for us ( and how they are very different from our own at times!), our relationship with Him, and the busyness of life. She then said, (and I love this!) "Well, are you going to tell me how to NOT be busy or just that I am too busy! Because I already know that!"

I can relate to her frustration. Sometimes we get caught up in the "busyness trap," and we don't see a way out! We know we are not feeling at peace, but don't know how to slow down. Sometimes we are looking for a "magic formula" or some "secret."

I wish I had a "secret" to tell you. There is no "magic formula." We all know in our hearts what we need to do, but we struggle with doing it! It is so simple- we need to begin taking things OUT of our schedules instead of continuing to put them in! I heard some sound advice from Rick Warren (Purpose Driven Life) once- anytime you add a new activity to your life, you need to take something away. I know, I know, it sounds too simple. Then, your next question is HOW?! How do I remove "stuff?"

The first thing we need to begin doing is PRAYING about what God's will is for our lives. Now, we are really good at doing this when some big catastrophe comes up, or we have to make a huge decision, but we forget about the "little" things. Maybe we just don't want to "bother" God with the "trivial" stuff. Or, maybe we really don't want God's input into our activities because deep down we know He will tell us to let go of some things. Maybe we have just never thought about before!

Jesus was a busy guy here on earth! He WALKED (no cars to get Him there in a matter of minutes or hours, it took days!) the land, healing the sick, casting out demons, performing miracles, teaching the people, and ministering to them. But, I never saw Him stressed about His workload! Why? Two things. First, He got away OFTEN to pray! As busy as He was, He met with Father continually. And, the second was He always did the will of the Father.

I am sure that while He was on earth, Jesus could have healed many more. He could have taught more. He could have done more! But, He sought out God's will for Him, and when God said, "Go to the next town." It was time to go! In His obedience, He followed the Perfect Plan, doing exactly what He was meant to do.

How many times do I pray about my kids' activities? Now, I am pretty good about praying for God's will in my own activities (learned that the hard way!), and I seek out His will for what I am doing. I always tell people I need to pray first before I make a commitment. (Like I said I learned that the hard way!!!!) But, with my kids, I just barreled ahead, signing them up for all of these activities because, my goodness, if the girls don't dance, they will be deprived, or if Andrew doesn't play football, well, ALL boys play football. And, if you don't play soccer, you can't live in America!

God has really been dealing with me in this area over the last few years and it has been so LIBERATING! (Both for me and for the kids!) It started one spring when both girls were in dance and Andrew was busy with scouts and basketball. The girls were also playing soccer. A typical Saturday was two soccer games and a basketball game before noon. Well, the girls were supposed to get dance recital pictures taken, (different times) and Andrew had to do an activity for scouting. I was freaking out, wondering how I was going to pull all of this off, because they were at different times. The Holy Spirit spoke directly in my heart, "Tracy, you don't HAVE to get the dance picture! You'll take plenty of your own pictures. They just had soccer pictures done and Spring school pictures. Just because it is written on someone's calendar, it doesn't mean you HAVE TO DO IT!"

Freedom!!!!!!!!!!! I never realized until that moment that I didn't have to do these things!

I don't have to go to that meeting, just because they are having it? I don't have to sign the kids up for this, even though "everybody" else is?!

The climax came the next fall. I had already decided that we would take a break from dance. The girls weren't "in love" with it as much as mom anyway! So, we decided we would only do soccer for them, with church on Wed. nights and Indian Princesses once a month. Well, mom missed the deadline to sign up. I immediately felt guilty and horrible. I rushed to the YMCA with my check, hoping to still get in (it was only one day after the deadline!). They wouldn't take my money, but they did put me on a waiting list. Then, I felt a leading to pray. I realized I hadn't really sought out God's will in all of this. I know He has plans for my children as well as me, and I needed to seek Him out in all of this. Well, I prayed that if it was His will that they do soccer, then He would open that door. But, if it was better for the girls not to play in the spring, that He would close the door. I surrendered it to Him and asked Him to be over it.

Well, the girls did NOT get on a team (hallelujah!) and it was wonderful! They were so happy! They were able to play (like kids!) after school and our Saturdays were spent as a family, doing some chores, running to Target for our groceries, and then having fun! They just needed a break. They both are playing again, but it was a season where God's best was that we didn't do it.

Jesus promises that His burden is light. Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, (remember- Jesus prayed and spent time with the Father, and obeyed the will of the Father) for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” If we are not experiencing peace, then something is wrong. Isaiah says, “You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.” If God has truly called you to everything you are doing, then He will equip you to handle it all! Let us seek God and ask Him what we should be doing with our time.

"My soul finds rest in God alone."

I pray that you will experience the peace that passes all understanding as you continue to seek Him out- above all!

My prayer for you today (from Psalm 20)
"May the Lord answer you when you are in distress (when the washer has broken down, when you are feeling sick, when your child has failed a test...)
May the name of God of Jacob protect you.
May He send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion.
May He remember all of your sacrifices. (Selah- think on this...)
May He give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.
We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the Name of the Lord!
May the Lord grant all of your requests.
We trust in the Name of the Lord our God."

Blessings!
In His grace, love, joy, and PEACE,
Tracy

Please visit Lori at All You Have to Give for more inspiration!

Lord, bring me back!

Wow.

I was reading an old journal this morning during my very SHORT prayer time (got up late!) and Lord, as I read it, my heart cried out for You! Where is this girl who poured out her heart to You, who dove into the Word, hungry for more and more and more? Reading my commentary of several Old Testament passages, I was a little surprised by my wisdom and understanding of the scriptures which ONLY comes from the Holy Spirit. None of me- all of You, Lord. I do not want this to sound prideful at all because it is not TRACY, but You, God!

You had given me such depth of knowledge of what I was studying that it surprised me this morning. But, hasn't that been my prayer from the start? That You Lord would "give me a spirit of wisdom and understanding so that I may know You better?" And, when "you draw near to God, He will draw near to you." And, "Seek the Lord with all your heart and He will be found by you." Those have always been my prayers.....what I have been crying out for from the beginning. You answer prayer! I had forgotten the things I had written. That makes me sad.

I want to continue to grow in You, Lord. I want to continue to go deeper. I want to experience You more and more. I want Your Word to continue to open up to me and "blow me away."

Last week I was listening to Revelation (Audio Bible) and again, Revelation 2:2-5 hit me.

"I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance....Yet
I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the
height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at
first."

Oh, Lord, I repent! I do not want to forsake You! I want to draw nearer to You, not become distant! O, Lord, forgive me!

What is going on?

One thing that comes to mind is busyness. Oh, how the enemy loves to use this against me! And, it is not a new trick, but one that is "tried and true" that he brings back again and again to trip me.

We were especially busy this past weekend because we had a family party here at our home. We celebrated Abigail's 1st birthday (March 19), Andrew's 12 (April 23), and Aaron's 5th (April 2nd) with our extended family. They all came from Illinois. Brian's parents spend the winters in Fort Myers, FL, so we waited for them to return. So.........we were busy getting our home ready, gardens planted, grass mowed, closets cleaned (come on, Tracy! Like anyone is going to see the closet!).....and on and on.... So, Sunday, when everyone had left, I spent time refreshing myself reading blogs, soaking in encouragement from other Christian bloggers. One common theme I found was that many of us are in the same "boat!" We are weary and needing to be refreshed in the Lord.

One blogger (I'm sorry- I can't remember now which blog it was- I visited several!) said that she needed to rest in the Lord....that when life is getting so busy, He is there telling her to come sit with Him awhile. That was such encouragement to my soul! Lord, I know I need to come and rest in You....to come and sit with You awhile. I love You so much, Lord. I want to grow in my relationship with You! I don't want to backslide! I don't want to forget my first love! I love You so much, Jesus!

Thank You for reminding me about these journals. Thank You for reminding me that "You pour out Your wisdom GENEROUSLY to anyone who asks." Thank You for slowing me down to rest in You. I know You are the most important thing in life. I know You are my first love. I rededicate myself to You. I ask You, Lord, to fill my cup to overflowing again. My heart and flesh cry out, for You the living God. You are life. You are life. I love You.

Miracle Monday

I can do all things through Christ!!!!!!

Now, I usually am very careful when I claim this verse because in our generation, it can be an "excuse" to pile on more and more and more and more.....And I have to admit, I have been the "chiefest of sinners" in this area.

"Should do this."

"We really need to do this."

"Everyone is doing that (who IS everyone anyway???)

I have often put unnecessary pressure on myself to volunteer, participate, be involved in ALL things available. I have felt guilt when I have said "no" or when we "skipped out of things."

But, praise God, He has taught me to slow down, how to say "no," and how much is too much. I have learned to let the peace of God rule my decisions. If, as a believer, I am to experience the "peace that passes all understanding" in "all circumstances" (as Paul did), but am feeling "stressed out," then something is wrong. I am either depending on SELF to do the things He is calling me to do, or I am doing things that are out of His will. Ladies, for me, this revelation in and of itself is a MIRACLE! I was the mom who stayed up to 3 AM baking sugar cookies for a preschool class, decorated with each child's name in icing calligraphy!!!!! Crazy! One of my first revelations was that soccer was NOT mandatory, and if Andrew didn't like it, we didn't HAVE to do it!!! God has delivered me from this worldly mindset and it is a miracle! I have had to say "no" to kids at times, volunteer coordinators, and friends. There is a temptation to feel guilty, but when I am filled with the Holy Spirit and depending on Him to lead me, I have been released of that!

Now, after saying all that, I have to say what my miracle was last week! With 5 kids, there will be times when life is busy. And for some families, our lives may seem crazy. That is why I have had to learn to depend on God to show me WHAT and HOW. We had so much going on, but by His grace, I was able to "do all things through Christ who strengthens me." I was able to do the things He was calling me to do, completely at peace, NOT STRESSED out, without any occurrence of Monster Mom. I didn't yell at my kids. I didn't "lose it." Thank you, Lord, because that is a miracle for me! Our week started out calmly with soccer practices Mon. and Tues.

On Wednesdays, we host an after school club with 6 girls (2 of my own) called "God's Girls." It is so fun! We read a bible story about a woman from the bible, learn a verse, journal, and make a craft. This is Aly with her prayer journal basket we made.

On Thursday, we had a birthday party for Aaron, who turned 5. I used to have a children's birthday party business, so I had all of the pirate party supplies. What LOOKS like a lot of work, really wasn't! And, Iris, I did NOT make that cute cake! I was tempted (but knew it would have been too much to do- thank you, God!), but purchased it from Target!

On Friday, Aaron' preschool class took a field trip to the garden center. I helped drive to the field trip and had a great time! We came home and took a nap!

Friday night brought the "Fun Fair", the kids' school carnival. We had a blast!

Saturday, Aaron had a bowling party to go to.....

And later the same day, we had a family roller skating party to attend. By this time, Aaron had had enough and had a major meltdown at the roller rink. Again, by God's grace, and knowing that this little guy had done one too many activities, we "let him be." The "old me" might have been embarrassed and made him put on his skates, but not the "new me"! The old has gone and the new has come, praise God! We gave him some space and he had fun pretending to play pinball. Afterwards, we came home and snuggled and watched a movie. Everyone but Dad and Ashley fell asleep in the middle of it!

Thank you, God, for a wonderful week last and many family memories. Thank you for the miracle of making us new creations. Thank you that transform us. Thank you that your peace rules us, and when we are feeling "unrest" or lack of peace, we know that something is wrong. I thank you for the Holy Spirit and that "your sheep hear your voice." Thank you that when we turn to you, you help us every step of the way. Lord, your way is truly miraculous! Praise you, God! Praise you!

For more miracles, please visit Beth at A Mom's Life:

http://beth-amomslife.blogspot.com/2008/04/miracle-monday_14.html