What are YOU learning?

One of my "life passages" is Romans 12:1-2.

Therefore, in view of God's mercy, offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God- this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

This is my "ministry", helping women to see beyond the "here and now", entangled with this world's temptations and entanglements, and to live for God.

One of my favorite books is 1Peter where Peter writes a letter to a group of Christians suffering for their faith. He repeatedly tells them to live as aliens and strangers here on earth....holy and set apart for the Lord.

I love these passages! I understand these passages because I have experienced such a "love affair" with the world! I understand firsthand how important it is to "keep on top" of it....to purposely live transformed in my thinking- NOT CONFORMED to the world's attitudes.

These are issues I have battled and overcome.

So, when those "old feelings" surface again, it can be surprising and disarming!

Let me explain what happened.

I joined FACEBOOK. ('nuff said?)

As I looked around at many of my FB friends, I saw perfect bodies, perfect skin, perfect hair, perfect lives....

Many of these people I have not seen since high school...I don't know if they know the Lord...

One precious woman wrote that she was excited because the designer stiletto shoes she had been waiting for arrived.

I didn't even know the who the designer was!

Life on FB seemed glamorous....

living in Chicago, working in glamorous lives, looking glamorous....

I felt overwhelmed with a "I don't measure up" feeling.

I battled the same feelings a few years ago when I walked into a going away party for a friend. I was just dropping off a gift and didn't stay.

I had been gardening, so had on my shorts and t-shirt. I walked into party where the women were DRESSED for a party and dressed "to the nines."

I hadn't been prepared for the ultra expensive home, decorated like a magazine...

As I looked around, I felt inadequate...

Being a woman's speaker, I thought, "What could these women want from me? What do I have to offer them? They have it all! Why would they want to listen to what I have to say?"

This was the same feeling that came over me when I began exploring FB...

Of course, my BRAIN could make all of the correct arguments....

If these women don't have Jesus, then all of the material and worldly things won't make them happy... having a relationship with the Lord is more than anything here on earth.

I am not dependent on who I am in the world, but who I am in Christ.

I KNOW all these things in my head...

BUT...

it didn't change how I felt.

I had to go back to the Word (and to my Spiritual Mama!).

I called Donna and cried on her shoulder, telling her all of this.

And, she said something so wise.

She said, "Tracy, it is natural that you feel 'left out.' This is how we are SUPPOSED to feel as Christians...left out with ways of the world."

I hadn't thought of it that way before.

I am so familiar with 1Peter and "being strangers and aliens in the world." I know this world is not my home. The message translation says, "don't become cozy in it." But, I hadn't thought about "feeling left" out before.

Yes, it is hard at times to make Godly choices. And, sometimes I do feel "out of it" when I can't join the conversation because I haven't seen "that" movie...

or listen to secular music...

or watch popular (to the world) TV programs.

I am sure this is even harder for our daughters...

not watching MTV

or dressing MTV

or talking MTV

or staying pure, unlike MTV....

The NKJ translation says we are PECULIAR people! We SHOULD feel peculiar...

But, sometimes, it FEELS peculiar to be peculiar...

I guess that is why Paul says in Romans 12:1 to "offer your bodies as a living sacrifice." It will be a sacrifice at times to not conform to the world. At times it will feel uncomfortable to not conform to the world.

1Peter 2:113-16: So think clearly and exercise self-control. Look forward to the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world. So you must live as God’s obedient children. Don’t slip back into your old ways of living to satisfy your own desires. You didn’t know any better then. (I lived such a worldly life before Christ. God tells me to NOT slip back to that old way of living!) But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God who chose you is holy. For the Scriptures say, “You must be holy because I am holy.”

3:1- 12: So get rid of all evil behavior. Be done with all deceit, hypocrisy, jealousy, and all unkind speech. Like newborn babies, you must crave pure spiritual milk so that you will grow into a full experience of salvation. Cry out for this nourishment, now that you have had a taste of the Lord’s kindness. You are coming to Christ, who is the living cornerstone of God’s temple. He was rejected by people, (if Jesus was rejected by the world, why would I be surprised by feeling uncomfortable in it?) but He was chosen by God for great honor.
And you are living stones that God is building into his spiritual temple. What’s more, you are his holy priests. Through the mediation of Jesus Christ, you offer spiritual sacrifices that please God. As the Scriptures say, “I am placing a cornerstone in Jerusalem, chosen for great honor, and anyone who trusts in him will never be disgraced.” Yes, you who trust him recognize the honor God has given him. But for those who reject him,
“The stone that the builders rejected has now become the cornerstone.”
And, “He is the stone that makes people stumble, the rock that makes them fall.”
They stumble because they do not obey God’s word, and so they meet the fate that was planned for them.

9 But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light.
10 “Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.”
11 Dear friends, I warn you as “temporary residents and foreigners” to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against your very souls. (there will be a battle...these desires war against my soul!) 12 Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.

Please visit Gina at Chats with an Old Lady for more What are YOU learning!

Motherly Mothers Gathering at the Well...

This week at the Gathering, we are talking about the Transformation to "Motherly":

The discussion questions are:

Are there areas of hardness and coldness in my life?
What are the roots of these? Do I need to release someone who has hurt me in my past? Do I need to confess and release myself from the bondage of sinful patterns in my own life?What are some ways that I can turn the conversation around when other women begin to gripe and complain about their children?

Name some creative ways we can create warmer, more inviting
environments for our children.

Hmmmm....Whenever I watch "Leave It To Beaver," I
always so amazed at how

"perfect" June Cleaver is. She is everything I want to be..

Meek.

Sweet.

Gentle.

Wise.

Forgiving.

Inviting.

Warm.

She doesn't lose her temper.

She doesn't say things to her boys that she regrets.

She doesn't yell.

One of my favorite scripture passages is 1Peter 3:3-4

Wives, your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair
and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of
your inner self, the unfading beauty of a GENTLE and QUIET spirit, which is of
great worth in God's sight.

The Amplified says, "But let the inward adorning and beauty of the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible and unfading charm of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which [is not anxious or wrought up, but] is very precious in the sight of God."

Oh, how I want the hidden person of my heart to be gentle and sweet. How I want to be a Light shining the gentleness and love of Jesus.

One area where I struggle is having a critical spirit. I have high expectations for myself. I am "hard on myself." I tend to get mad at myself if I don't "perform" to my standards. I have struggled with feelings of being a failure when I don't do what I think I need to do.

So.....at times, I project that on my husband...and kids. When my husband is sick, for example, I will think, "when I AM sick, I keep going. Why can't he???"

And....I can be critical with my kids....put too high of expectations on them.

Criticizing.

Fathers, do not irritate and provoke your children to anger [do
not exasperate them to resentment], but rear them [tenderly] in the training and
discipline and the counsel and admonition of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
AMPLIFIED

Tenderly.

This is something God has revealed to me (THANKFULLY!) and something (only through God) that I have improved upon tremendously. When I allow the Holy Spirit to guide me, I don't have to say the first thought that pops into my mind (like, "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU......")

But not without consequences.

My 12 year old often will be critical of his younger siblings.

So, it is training in the counsel of the Lord. For both of us!

Washing ourselves in the Word transforms our thinking and our negative responses.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is
helping building others up (encouraging) according to THEIR needs, that it may
benefit those who listen. Ephesians 2:29

and...

Clothe yourselves (this means I must make the choice- just as I
put on physical clothing, I must CLOTHE myself spiritually) with compassion,
kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other (I should bear
with my own children!) and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one
another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues, put on
love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14

Above all things have an intense and unfailing love for one another, for love
covers a multitude of sins [forgives and disregards the offenses of others].
1Peter 4:8

It is a "fine line" that we walk as parents. We must teach our children how to live blameless and pure, seeking God and His ways. I have to teach my children the difference between right and wrong. I must discipline them. There must be consequences for bad behavior.

But, one thing that God has whispered to me repeatedly, especially with Aly, my most sensitive child is "Be careful. Don't beat her up. Don't beat down her spirit."

I am so thankful for the Holy Spirit's guidance. And, when I make mistakes, I must go to my kids and apologize and ask for their forgiveness.

One of my favorite quotes is:

One of the best books I have read on PRACTICAL ideas of how to be motherly (and wifely and Godly!) is "A Woman After God's Own Heart." Elizabeth George gives practical ideas such as celebrating when your kids come home from school. This has such an impact on my kids when I make the time to do it! I have our fancy dishes out to give them a snack and sit down to talk about their day. It is a celebration that they are returning home. I loved this idea and they do as well!

I think the most important thing about being a motherly mother is being there for them....talking with them....sharing time and secrets with them....being THERE- mentally and physically. My kids love to watch movies together. But, they don't like if I am on the laptop when we are. They want my whole attention (even if we are giving our attention to the TV screen!). If we are in a conversation and the phone rings, I don't want them to think that the person on the phone is more important than them. I tell them I will call back.

God has blessed me with the most important ministry a person can ever have- being a mother. It is more important than speaking and writing. It is more important than teaching Sunday School. It is more important than leading a small group women's bible study. It is more important than volunteering in the community.

How I long to be that Proverbs 31 woman whose "children arise and call her blessed."

Please visit the Gathering at the Well for more motherly insight!