Have you ever been desperate for God? Have you experienced a time when it seemed God had abandoned you? A time when you just couldn't "feel" God's Presence?
Most of you know that my father-in-law passed away right before Thanksgiving. Then....we went right into the holidays. I felt immense pressure being a first year homeschooling family. My church is going through HUGE struggles right now. We have been here since we moved to Iowa- for 13 years- this is my family. And of course, just "life" seemed to deal me a blow at every corner. Andrew has been asking tough questions about his faith and God (he is 14). Bills, laundry, the cares of home of family....
I found myself avoiding God. Instead of crying out to Him, I ran away from Him. There were plenty of distractions to keep me busy....the Wii, the computer, the TV, activities....anything to avoid facing the "work" of allowing God to heal my heart.
Boy, the enemy LOVES when we do this. It is a perfect opportunity for him to kick us when we're down. He brings everything possible into our lives to further discourage us- a forgotten bill to pay, a cold, fighting kids- you name it. You know, "what ever CAN go wrong DOES go wrong!" And, then he whispers in your ear, "You're a failure. You are not good enough. You are unloved. No one appreciates you. God isn't there."
Sisters, know those are COMPLETE lies from the enemy!
I (you) are loved. Yes, I could never be "good" enough, but thanks be to God, I don't have to be! I am perfect in Christ! In Christ, I am MORE than good enough....in Christ I have everything I need and His grace is sufficient for me. I am NOT a failure, but "more than a conqueror" in Christ Jesus. God appreciates me. He has numbered the very hairs on my head. I am "precious and honored" in His sight. God is here. He has never left me. He calls to me. Whispers to me.
"I will never leave you. I will never forsake you. I am with you wherever you go."
So, as I walk through this wilderness, the Promised Land in my sight, I cry out like David, "O God, You are my God, earnestly I seek You. My soul thirsts for You, my body longs for You, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
I have seen You in the sanctuary and beheld Your power and Your glory. Because Your love is better than life, my lips will glorify You. I will praise You as long as I live, and in Your name, I will lift up my hands."
I am at Laced with Grace today sharing about SPIRITUAL BATTLES and how I fought this latest one.... I hope you jump over there to read it!
Also, THANK YOU so much for all of your prayers as I have been walking this road. Many days they have truly gotten me through. Thank you, friends.
Pushin' with you, girls....
Labels:
spiritual warfare,
trials
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3 thoughts shared....:
Tracy, your spiritual battle reminded me of one I went through shortly after starting my breast cancer surgery. I too kicked myself for not running to Him sooner than I did. We all tend to do that, but the good thing is, He is there when we finally make it back around to facing Him.
If you want, read my posting. Scroll down quickly to get to the good stuff. I'll be praying for you to run to Him quicker and quicker everytime Satan pulls his stunts (and you know it will happen again)
http://amidlife-ajourney.blogspot.com/2009/06/be-still-my-soul.html
Love you sister
Mindy
This is such a wonderful blog and I love what you have written here. Thanks for sharing the spiritual blessings and words of wisdom.
God Bless.
Ria C
It's My Party
Home is Where the Heart Is
Red Lips and Pinky Toes
Handmade with LOVE
Just wanted to let you know that I've not forgotten you Tracy. I was so sad when I heard about your father-in-law's death. I'm sure with the timing of the holidays it was difficult.
You did such an awesome job on the heart makeover Bible study. I loved participating in that one. It really helped me to open up my heart more and risk. That was something that was so hard for me to do. So thank you Tracy and thank you Lord.
hugs to you,
Debbie
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